Saturday, February 20, 2010

A new Beginning...

Sorry I haven't been posting much other than Prayers, but I really haven't had the strength to go on and on about my time of limbo. My heart hurt too much and really didn't have the strength to share. I wanted to stop by today and at least tell you where we're at.

To make a long story short. Today was a very hurtful day. First and foremost because of having a D&C on my birthday. Then to have my step daughter create her 'usual' derespectful tantics that started yesterday into today that got me so angry. Adding more hurt to my soul at this awful moment in my life. Uncalled for and Unforgiving. Plain and simple. Always about herself. It would take days and pages of posts to ever describe to you all what I've been through with that child since she was 13 yrs old (she is now 21). So I'll just leave it at I pretty much told her to 'grow up and get over herself!" Moving on....

So tomorrow I'm taking the day to celebrate MY BIRTHDAY. As today I really couldn't even though I did have a few beers with pizza for dinner, but I'm so exhausted from being put 'under' today....tomorrow I'm waking up renewed & embracing a NEW day.

As I mentioned above, I had a D&C today. Yes, it was still tissue remaining from the miscarriage that was removed and my uterus lining scraped. With this done, I now wait for my period to show up. I'm assuming about a month or so. Then another saline u/s will be performed to make sure my uterus is clear and hopefully I'm FINALLY good to go. I'm going to take this 'extra' time and keep taking the DHEA and Royal Jelly to help with egg quality. Hopefully this is what God's intentions were for me. ~Praying~

As always, I will continue to keep my FAITH, and HOPE and PRAY that there will be my 'golden egg' next time around that will finally bring home my bundle of joy to hold in my arms come January of next year.

Good Night girls. Have a great weekend!

~God Bless~

xox

3 comments:

Jenn said...

I'm so sorry you had to go through that procedure. I understand how all the hurt, pain, etc gets magnified when dealing with a step daughter. My husband has a 10 year old, and she causes 80% of the strees in my life (and our marriage). Well, her and her mom!

Charity said...

OXXOXOX my thoughts and prayers are with you <3

Lorrie S said...

Thanks girls.

It's best to leave her at bay. Raegan (my grand-daughter) is all that's important to me when it comes to my step daughter. She has caused me so much grief in the 10+ years I've been with my husband that's it's just not worth it to try and have a normal relationship with her when all she does is be vendictive like her step dad. That's who taught her that, no one else and that's who she betrayed her father for many years ago. Nothing will ever change and it's time for me to cut that link. It's time for me now. My time to have a family of my own. Let her tend to her own demons and games without including me in them anymore. Cause I'm done playin.

God Bless.

L