Lord, as soon as I get some shear inch of HOPE on this journey, that maybe, JUST maybe one day my dream of becoming a mother will finally come true, BAM! Black cloud is back!The 'baby fund' as I called it sometime ago that we have aside and trying to add to it as we go along is being compremised. My husbands work truck had some major issues and needs some pretty expensive repairs, $3000+ in repairs to be exact!!! It's enevitable not to touch our funds for this because reality is that without a work truck, there's no work. So here we are again and again I ask myself the same questions to God....
Is this a sign? Is the path to Motherhood not in store for me?
My age is such a disheartening reminder that time is going by and turning 45 in Feb 2012 is not far away. It saddens me to no end at the thought that I am back to square one from what seems like over 5 years ago, but at least I was 5 years younger. We didn't know what we were going to do to make this baby dream happen. Then things fell into place, we did a fundraiser and cycled, then insurance coverage came to us by some miracle and cycled 3 times more, had our blessing but lost it. Now I feel helpless. At our wits end really....
I guess it's back to wishful thinking and lottery tickets...
1 comment:
My heart breaks for you. It truly does. I pray nightly for you. I always ask God to bless you with a child. I wish there were something more I could do for you. I know I have said it time and time again but you are a great person and you deserve to be happy and to be a mother. Stay strong friend. Love you.
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